Unspoken
by 8000-o-clock
Summary: This story focuses primarily on Murdoc and Noodle after they escape from Hell. UPDATE: Murdoc begins to notice changes in Noodle...dangerous changes. But the only way to help her means that he has to admit his deep, dark secrets. MudsXNood
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer:**__ This story takes place in the current time frame. Noodle has just been rescued from Hades by Murdoc, and as a side-story, the band is working on their third album._

Darkness-----

The room was unusually cold, even for Kong. The small, Japanese girl pulled her pink covers up to her neck and was still shivering. Her big, green eyes were open wide as she tried to scan the room for any abnormal activity. She didn't know what it was, but something just didn't feel right to her.

Ever since she had escaped from Hell with Murdoc, Noodle knew she was not the same person. Even a slight crash like something falling would cause her to completely tense up . She had no desire to fight zombies at all anymore, and she had stopped practicing her martial arts all together. But that was nothing compared to what had happened to her body. Scabs on top of scars circled her limbs and he face. Her eyes, while still the same bright green, were hollow and faded deep down from all the horrors she had witnessed. Noodle was not the same girl, by any definition.

The night was the worst, though. She couldn't remember the last time she had a decent night's sleep. It was almost as though she had been sleeping with one eye open for the past three months.

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. She angrily kicked off the covers and threw her pillow down on the ground, breathing heavily as she stood bare-foot on the cold floor. She needed to get away from here, but where would she go? It's not like she coud actually leave Kong, she didn't want to be alone at night in a city full of strangers. Noodle paced slowly into the kitchen with her head down and purple locks dangling in her face.

Noodle moved throughout the different rooms slowly, her legs weak and breathing was labored. She tried desperately to remember everything that had happened three months ago, but it would only come in as fuzzy frames. She could not remember the first two weeks she was back, and when she finally woke up, her band-mates had informed her that she was just barely alive.

The girl felt warm, tiny tears run down her cheek as she remembered seeing them all again for the first time. 2D had been standing over her on her right side, just looking down at her and smiling softly every so often. He looked completely shocked for the most part, she could tell he was starring at her in disbelief. The singer didn't say much during that time, but he was always there for her. There to hold her if she had a night-mare, and to squeeze her hand when she was in pain. There were even a couple of times where he sneaked her some of his strong, perscription pain-killers because she would stay up late, sobbing only loud enough for his ears to pick up.

Russell was a bit more open about the whole ordeal. He was almost always breaking down, but was somehow was able to be strong for Noodle. Whenever she needed him, he was there. He treated the horrible wounds that littered her body, helped her regain her strength and slept by her side almost every single night until she was well enough to be left alone.

Murdoc was....Noodle blinked as his name ran through her head. Murdoc....wasn't really around. She knew that he was ill as well, but she had barely seen him since she was back. And when they did cross paths, he didn't speak much or even at all. He seemed to have a bad limp on his right side and most of his wounds were still visible, even though they were healing. She had also noticed his age more, he almost seemed to hunch over a bit as he walked at a slower pace. There was no more bounce in his step, no more attitude in his voice. It was almost as if his soul was gone, everything that made him Murdoc had left his body and all that was left was the shell.

She blinked again as she broke herself out of the deep thought. Looking back and forth across the deserted hallways, she knew where she wanted to go now.

******

Murdoc flinched as he felt the wind at his back blow in through various cracks through his Winnebago. The air was so cold as it traveled up his bare spine, yet he didn't bother to cover himself. He could feel it now more than ever before, he noticed things more, even little slight things he would normally have not paid attention to three months ago. Everything was more defined; sight and smell, sounds came in clearer and anything he touched seemed to travel throughout his body and back out. He sat up with his back against the bedroom wall and his feet laid out straight in front of him. It seemed getting the energy for the smallest tasks was now impossible, he had to take deep breaths just to get up and walk out of the room.

Smoking was the only vice left remaining in his old ways. It was perfect, helped him with stress and took little to no effort to do. Since drinking and chases skirts was out of the question for the time being, he relied on 2D to grab him cigarettes any time he left the building, which the singer obliged to without question.

His head leaned forward slightly as shaking hands lit the cigarette in front of his face. Even the sight glow from the lighter seemed like too much light right now. Murdoc inhaled deeply, letting his poison of choice fill his lungs, and then watched as it swirled back out his mouth and nostrils. He sighed deeply and laid down on his back, facing the ceiling blankly.

Murdoc was not the same man.

After a few more long drags from the fag, he forced his eyes shut and slammed his head angrily into the beaten-down pillow. He would have to try and force himself to sleep, since he had been out it for so many nights now.

Finally, the room was completely still. No sound, no movement. Not even Cortez made a peep from the front of the 'Baggo. This was what bothered the Satanist more than anything; nothing. There were no distractions or voices or anything happening, all that was left was his mind and the demons he had to eventually face. He knew there was no escaping the dangers of his memories, and he remembered each and every horrifying detail of the journey to Hades. Everything was still so vibrant and fresh in his brain, even after months. He often wondered how Noodle had dealt with everything that had happened to her.

Murdoc rolled over onto his side, eyes sad and staring straight ahead at the dingy wall. It wasn't often that Murdoc Niccals felt sad, and even less often that he felt guilty. But the girl...she was something completely different. Part of him felt cowardly about how he had been acting towards her. He knew he had been intentionally ignoring her, avoiding seeing how she was doing, not even talking to her. He just couldn't bring himself to deal with all that just yet.

Especially with what had happened to them in Hell.

The Winnebaggo squeaked. Murdoc's head jerked up quickly, almost instantly. The small creaking sounds echoed in his head, and he felt every muscle in his body tense simutaneously. Ever so slightly, the sounds got louder, closer. It seemed as though whatever it was was just about to round the corner to his bedroom. Murdoc sat up completely on his bed, not daring to move or even breathe as he clenched his fingers into tight, white fists. He shut his eyes firmly, and then jumped up in a flash.

Silence.

Murdoc squeezed one eye open slowly and scanned the room. Then, he opened the other eye. He looked down and saw a very familiar figure, yet he had to do a double-take to make sure he was seeing it there in his room.

".....Noodle? Is'at yew?" he asked, voice a bit softer than normal.

The small Jap peered up at him, head cocked to the side in confusion at his stance. "...Allo. I'm sorry.... did I wake you, Murdoc-san?"

Murdoc blinked a couple of times, not really sure how to respond to her being there. Then, he shook his head. "Nah, couldn't sleep. 'M sure yew can relate.."

"Aie, I can..." The teen trailed off and studied her feet uncomfortably. She was starting to think this was not the best course of action now that she was here. But, her gut was telling she needed to press on. "I just...I know it is late. I am sorry if I disturbed you, I should have knocked...." She trailed off again and inwardly cringed. Noodle didn't like apologizing too much, especially around Murdoc. He just intimidated her more than she wanted him to know, she always felt like she was babbling in front of him.

Murdoc, starting to feel a bit awkward, rubbed the back of his neck and stretched, faking fatigue. "S'awright, luv." He was glad it was dark in the room so she couldn't see him visibly cringe. He was always calling her some cutsie little nick-name, it was totally out of character for him to do. But then again, he had always felt a bit...unsure of himself around her.

"Anyway," she carried on, not wanting to make things more uncomfortable than need be. " I was actually just wanting to know......how are you?"

Murdoc starred at the girl, then looked down at the ground. "Wull..... I been betta." he smirked. "Bit of a sore leg, haven't been drinkn' as much really." He exhaled deeply, almost feeling a bit better that she had asked. Which was strange, he actually hadn't realized no one had bothered to ask him that one, simple question before now. Before her.

"I noticed you limping. Do you want me to take a look at it?" she offered, slightly bending down on one knee and extending a hand toward his sore leg before he could even answer.

"No..I..nah it's awright luv. Yew got your own battle-wounds to worry 'bout." Murdoc jerked his leg back instinctively, not wanting to terrify the girl with his mutilated limb. Even the slight movement made his leg throb in a horrid pain. They stood in silence for a few moments longer, but not an uncomfortable silence. It was more like an unspoken understanding of their situation. They would be lying if they had said they weren't closer from the two-year ordeal, something like that they would never forget. And even though they had been avoiding each other, both had their respective reasons to do so.

"Soooo....yew been-" Murdoc went to ask the girl the same question, when he was interrupted by a sudden jab in the guts, which was Noodle's body thrusting into him. She was hugging him so tight and shaking violently, Murdoc thought he might actually fall over. "Shhh.........s'okay luv. We're safe. Shhhh..."The bassist gingerly patted the girl's purple locks to try and calm her down. He knew it would only be a matter of time before it happened, he was just grateful it was her who had broken down first. She was now sobbing into his chest, her body having mild convulsions from the emotions flowing out of her. Secretly, he smiled softly down at her. He had been given the thing he needed most tonight; a friend, a distraction, and most importantly, a reason to be strong. He was grateful, to say the least.

"'Ere, c'mover 'n lay down, hun." He guided her to the dirty blanket and convinced her to rest her body down upon it (something you couldn't pay her to do before). He stood over her protectively, watching her sob and cover her hands over her face. Then, she did something unexpected. Noodle grabbed Murdoc's wrist slightly, pulling the bassist down closer to her. She pulled on his shirt and at first, he resisted. He was confused, did she want him to sit down? Slowly, he set himself down on the very edge of the bed, sitting up rigidly. But Noodle was not satisfied, she grabbed his shoulder, sniffling and sobbing, trying to pull him down even further.

Murdoc felt his heart skip oddly in his chest. "Noods....I dun...think I..." he whispered, trying to convince the small, sad girl he could not lay beside her. He just...didn't feel right for some reason. It would have been one of the few things Murdoc felt awkward about, even if it were just innocent. Especially in his bed.

Eventually, she gave up and grew weary. He watched as she yawned in her cute way, trying to fight of the inevidabe until she did fall asleep. Noodle breaths were soft and shallow, but it seemed as though she was in a deep, peaceful slumber. Murdoc was glad, she deserved sleep more than him. And he had no complaints having her safe in his sight to watch over her tonight.

_AN: So, first chapter of a new Gorillaz fan fic! This is going to be an on-going story with lot's of updates coming down the pipe soon. Thoughts?_


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: Still, do not own Gorillaz or any of the characters. The story however, is my own creation_

Murdoc shot his eyes open quicky, momentarily unaware of his surroundings. "Wot the-" He jerked his head around, mop-top hair flopping in front of his face as he studied the room. It was his bedroom, the same room as always. It was just...from a different perspective. He looked down and realized he had been sleeping in the old armchair he had in his room since Satan-only-knows. He made an odd expression for a moment, trying to grasp why he would be sleeping in a chair when he had a perfectly good....well, a bed. Slowly, he turned his gaze up towards his bed. His eyes followed a lump that traveled up to the edge of the blankets until he saw purple-tinted hair peaking out from under the covers.

_Aw yeah...though' tha' was a dream..._The bassist thought to himself. He sat for a moment, soaking up the simplicity of the situation in front of him. He knew that once Noodle woke up, it would be a whole different story. He rubbed the back of his neck and stretched out in the chair. "Not tha best sleep I eva had..." he mumbled to himself as he tried to work out all the kinks in his back. Murdoc stood up tall and stretched his spine out, throwing his long arms up over his head.

The Satanist starred down at the girl sleeping peacefully. It was such an odd sight for him to see something so sweet and pure surrounded with the variety of evil and dirty things that filled the room. He found himself smiling as he took a few steps closer to her. This beautiful, talented, sweet girl that had been dropped on his door step one day. The girl that had became famous with the band, and had contributed so much music to the world. The girl that, up until a few years ago, was like a daughter to the bassist.

Murdoc swallowed the lump in his throat. His mind raced over what had happened in Hades when he had finally found Noodle. She looked like she was on death's door. He cringed as he forced himself to remember the details from that day. The guitarist was skinnier than ever, eyes sunken in and outlined with dark circles. Her hair, now black, looked as if it had been torn out in large places throughout her head, and he could tell at least one of her arms was broken, maybe a few ribs as well. She was a frail, lifeless lump laying naked on the floor of Hell. The young girl had been tortured, tormented and almost pushed to her breaking point. Murdoc knew that if it had been anyone else, they wouldn't have lasted as long as she did.

He felt himself tense up, trying to imagine what it would have been like for her. "She was only 17...only a baby..." he muttered as he reached into his pocket for another smoke. Murdoc felt a wave of various emotions running through him, most of which being fear, sadness and anger. Especially anger. Anger that this amazing girl did not deserve any of the pain and fear and torture she had been subjected to over the past couple of years. Anger that she would have to deal with these emotional and physical scars for the rest of her life. But the thing that bothered him the most, was how long it took for her to be rescued. Two years. Two years in Hell. Alone, scared, hopeless, helpless....lost.

"...she must of thought we forgot about her." Murdoc whispered to himself, feeling the lump in his throat return. The thoughts were too much for him, and he tried to think of anything else that would distract his mind. He puffed on the cigarette slowly, realizing he was now sitting on the edge of the bed again, this time much closer to her. The bassist placed a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it softly. He felt a sudden urge to hold the young girl in his arms, just to have her close to him and make sure she was safe. Make sure that nobody would ever hurt her or steal her away from him again.

The bassist blinked and then shook his head. What was about this girl that made him feel so strange?

Murdoc sighed. It wasn't like it was a huge mystery to him. I mean, the man had been around the block a few times. He was 42 (soon to be 43) years old, he knew enough about life and relationships to understand what was going on. He just denied it, lied to himself, ignored what was really happening. _It's jus easier this way..._ he thought to himself. He knew he would have to keep on this way for the good of the band, and to salvage the very important relationship he currently had with Noodle. She was like a daughter to him.

Murdoc cringed. _Not really a daughter..._he thought to himself. Yes, that may very well be what the feeling was initially. She was a cute little ten-year old that had been plunked down into his lap. She spoke no English and loved cookies, candy and stuffed animals. And on top of all of that, she was an amazing guitarist, so she fit right in. Murdoc never told anybody, but he knew that even if the girl had been no good at the guitar, he would never have turned her away.

Yes, back in those days, she was a like a daughter to all of them. She had one of those infectious laughs and a smile that would light up the whole room. But more recently, before the whole Hades mishap, Murdoc had been noticing changes. It started off innocently enough one day, but he could remember ever detail.

-Flashback-

"Where the bloody-'ell are they!" Garbage began to fly through the hallway as Murdoc grumbled angrily to himself. The Satanist had misplaced his cigarettes and was frantically searching through different rooms in Kong when he came across the young girl. Noodle was sitting in the living room, reading a book. "'Ey, Noods", he shouting to her "yew seen any smokes 'round 'ere?" She bobbed her head up to look at him.

"Aye, no. Sorry Murdoc-san. Would you like for me to help you look?" She hopped up from her spot on the couch and walked over to him. He smiled down at her and ruffled her hair and it made the girl giggle a bit.

"Sure luv, lets start by looking in 'ere." They both searched the living area, throwing aside all the random trash and nick-naks that had gathered in the room. Murdoc was so focused on finding the fags, he hadn't even realized he was searching right behind Noodle, following in her trail. Something caught his eye, and his gaze somehow fell onto her soft, pale legs bent down in front of him. He did a double-take and his eyes widened, but did not look away. She was facing away from him, long, thin legs bent over and exposing a lot of flesh in a very close proximity to Murdoc. He felt his chest pound and his face get warm. It was just now that he was realizing all the short skirts and revealing clothes the girl liked to wear. And what nice legs she had...They looked gorgeous under her dark-denim skirt and cute knee-high socks. _Almost like a lil' school-girl..heh heh.._ Murdoc thought devilishly to himself. Why hadn't he noticed this before? I mean, he had been living with the girl for a while now. His eyes trailed up over her thighs and up to her backside. He watched as she moved in front of him, her perfect form locked into his line of vision.

He shook his head and looked back down at the carpet. _C'mon Muds, focus. _He started thinking over and over. _Must jus be needin' those smokes, I'm startn' to go loopy.._

Meanwhile, Noodle was now searching under the couch. She had almost her whole upper-half stuck under the piece of furniture. Murdoc saw this and slightly chuckled at the girl, she was so adorable. It was then that he really started to notice certain parts of her body. He gulped as he watched her. The short skirt the girl was wearing started to hike up a bit around her thighs and waist. As she continued searching and moving back and forth, Murdoc continued to watch her. As she was bent over in the odd position, he thought he could barely make out what look like a pair of cute, hot-pink undies. His mismatched eyes were focused on her ass, like he couldn't look away for some reason. It was amazing how....sexy she could look without even trying. Murdoc leaned up against the couch to balance himself from the sudden weakness in his knees. He felt the all too familiar tingling in the nether-regions of his body, and he began to panic.

_Wot tha bloody-Hell.....Oh c'mon Muds, don't freak out. That's just a normal reaction guys have to short skirts...especially when the girl has such cute ass..._

Murdoc blinked and then cleared his throat loudly. Had he really been checking her out? Noodle? I mean, it's not entirely impossible. Anyone could see she was becoming a beautiful woman. But there was something about her, something that grabbed his attention and made his whole body tense up and take notice of her.

"Murdoc-san, I found them!" she shouted out from behind the sofa. "Help me up..."

The bassist slowly walked over to her, searching for her arm on the ground. Noodle grabbed on to his extended limb and pulled herself up. Once she had regained her posture, she was standing face-to-face with the Satanist. He looked down at her, an odd expression on his face. She couldn't understand why he was looking at her so funny. Noodle held up the package of cigarettes for Murdoc to take, but he did not respond. It was almost like he was in a daze, like he was looking through her.

"M-Murdoc-san...?" she asked quietly. Noodle held his hand to place the package into them and she saw Murdoc visibly jump a bit.

"Wot? Oh... thank yah, darl'n." He pulled out one of the cigarettes without hesitation and put it to his lips. Noodle noticed his hands shaking and his face was a bit red. She walked closer to him.

"Are you okay?"

"Wot...uh...Yeah, luv. 'M fine. I jus needa have a lay-down." And with that, he briskly walked off towards the car park, leaving behind a very confused Noodle.

He knew he needed to get out of their fast. The ever-growing problem in his pants was a good indication to him that his feelings towards Noodle were not completely innocent anymore.

-End flashback-

Murdoc shook himself out of his deep thought and sighed aloud. He knew since then it had been completely different whenever he saw the young Jap. He would smile a bit more and stay with her longer, lingering around where ever she was and finding a reason to start up a conversation. But it wasn't just her ever growing body and her beautiful appearance that enticed him. At first it had been only slightly noticable to him, an odd feeling here and there. And then he realized (with great dismay) it was a full-blown crush. He, **Murdoc Niccals**, had a **CRUSH** on Noodle. Anytime he thought about her or was around her in certain situations, he would immediately start to feel aroused. He remembered as they debuted the music video for DARE. He had been given a private copy of the tape and plunked it into the old VCR in his Winnebaggo. Watching the young girl bounce up and down, shaking her backside back and forth, he felt like a wild animal the first time he saw it. The video quickly became one if his favorites in his collection.

He would call her over for 'private sessions' of discussing work on the up-coming album. They would play music together into the late hours of the night, until they were both too tired to keep going. She was so sweet and bright, her enchanting personality matched with her clever witt was the only reason he looked forward to waking up in the morning. Noodle had become so very important to him, in more than a few ways.

He looked down at her now, beaten down and broken from her awful ordeal. Her spirit had been damaged and her body was so different. She almost didn't look like the same girl.

Suddenly, she started to stir on the bed. Slight moans and short breathes emitting from her as she shook off the spell of her deep sleep. He watched her, soaking in each moment that he could see her sleep in his own bed. He stayed seating on the bed, mentally cursing himself for getting aroused at such an inappropriate time.

"MMm, Murdoc-san?" she whispered, half covered in his blankets.

"Yeah, luv. 'M here."

She sat up slowly and took in her surroundings. Then, she sat up on the edge of the bed in front of him and looked up to meet his gaze. He became lost in her emerald-green eyes. Those beautiful eyes he spent so much time thinking about. "Is...is it late?" she asked.

"Nah, it's still early. You can probably sneak back into yo' room without anyone noticin'" he said reluctantly, secretly wanting her to stay and just fall back asleep.

"Yes....thank-you. For everything." she said with a small smile as she rose to her feet. She raised her arms high over her head and closed her eyes tight into a yawn, allowing his eyes to secretly look over her out-stretched body. He quickly looked away before she walked in front of him.

"No problm', luv." he gave her a small smile back. As she walked by, she came in a few steps closer to Murdoc. Noodle suddenly leaned into him, wrapping her thin arms around him in a hug as she felt a few small tears trace down her cheek. She didn't know what it was about Murdoc, but she just felt safe around him. She found it hard to pull herself away when she felt his arms hold her in closer to him. They stood this way for a few moments, before Noodle broke off and headed out the door.

He was alone again. Left with his thoughts of the young guitarist. How on Earth was he going to deal with this....

_End Chapter 2! W00t, this ones a bit longer than the first, but I guess with all the background story it took up a bit more time. Hope you enjoyed! Chapter 3 will be coming up shortly. _


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: Story will get more in depth now. Also, this chapter and possibly next with be told mainly through Noodle's POV_

**1 Month Later **

Sunday.

Noodle hated Sundays. In fact, it seemed like everybody in Kong studios despised that particular day of the week. The guys were all moping about in their own rooms, occasionally poking their heads out to get food or grab a movie from the main living area. This was the day that everybody would usually keep to themselves and wind down from a wild few nights to prepare themselves for a busy work week.

But in the midst of people coming and going out of the living room, nobody had bothered to say anything to the small Jap who had been slumped down into the large chair. Perhaps they didn't see her there, or they were too preoccupied with themselves. Noodle didn't mind it, she enjoyed to people-watch. And she had to admit that since she had been sitting there unnoticed, it had been pretty entertaining for her.

First, 2D had come whistfully waltzing through the room in a rather doped-up state, humming to himself as per usual. He riffled through some of the drawers and cupboards of the kitchen, no doubt looking for his medication and obviously thinking he was alone. He stood in the middle of the kitchen and looked around. The singer furrowed his brow and scratched at his crotch while lazily scanning the room. Noodle giggled to herself.

Finally, 2D shrugged and opened the fridge to get some water. From her secret spot on the chair, Noodle could easily see the prescription medication he was looking for sitting on top of the fridge. He was almost eye-level with it, she couldn't believe he hadn't found it by now. Just as the singer was putting the water jug back into the fridge, she saw the back of his blue head jerk up in a quick motion.

_Took you long enough, Dee_ the guitarist thought to herself. Stu turned around with a dopey grin on his face and twisted the top off the drugs quickly. In one fell swoop, he had the pills in his mouth and a mouthful of water to chase them down. The small singer yawned from her comfy spot as she grew bored with the singers actions and decided to busy herself with the crossword puzzle in her lap.

It had been about an hour and a half until Russel's loud foot-steps could be heard echoing through the hallways. His large frame entered her line of vision as he chose from a variety of chips, cookies and a large sandwich from the fridge. It looked as though he was finished in the room and about to shut the door, until he did a double take in the appliance and reached inside, pulling out a frosty can of beer. And with that, he swiftly turned back in the direction he came and thumped his way out of the room.

Noodle sighed, she was left alone again to entertain herself. Sundays were so boring.

And just as she was about to give up hope and trudge back into her room, she heard the all-too-familiar sound of Cuban boots stomping in her direction.

Enter Murdoc.

She sat up slightly straighter in the chair, finding herself holding her breath as she waited to see his dark figure enter the room. Sure enough, the bass-player sauntered in silently, not even noticing her presence. She felt her chest go tight.

Noodle couldn't quite put her finger on why she was acting this way around him now, and quite frankly, she preferred not to even think about it. But sometimes she just couldn't ignore the subtle hints her body would give her; her muscles going tense, face getting a bit flushed, and just a general strange feeling whenever she came face-to-face with Murdoc.

In the past, the situation between Murdoc and her (before this whole 2-year ordeal) was a silent agreement. They both knew they didn't have much, if anything, in common. Aside from being decades apart age-wise, they had completely different personalities and barely conversed outside of a work environment. But that didn't stop them from enjoying each others' company and she always knew he held a soft spot for her. There was a closeness there, just not one that needed to be discussed or labeled. It worked for the two of them and there was never any problems.

And now this.

Noodle buried her pale face into her knees as she pulled her body into a tightly-coiled ball. What was all this confusion about Murdoc now? I mean, yes...he had rescued her from Hades, but it shouldn't have surprised her. They were a family after-all and she would have done the same for him. But in her mind, she kept replaying the scenario over and over again. He had saved her, risking his own life to do so. That was all she could think of every time she saw his face or heard his name. It seemed that she noticed his pressence a bit more now, looked at him a bit longer, studied his expressions and his actions. She knew she was building him up to be some sort of iconic being now, and she hated thinking that maybe he was thinking about her. If anything, he seemed to be avoiding her like the plague lately.

Noodle groaned under her breath. She hated to admit it, but a part of her could almost understand why people followed him in drones just to be in his proximity. Murdoc had a strange, intriguing power about him that made others sit up and take notice.

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Murdoc plowed through the cupboards angrily. He was searching for any form of alcohol since he had run low on his own supply. Cans and boxes all flew across the room as he continued to pull out the contents from each shelf. Nothing. Murdoc sighed and slapped his hand on his forehead. _I con't believe nobody else in 'is place drinks..._

The Satanist pulled out a chair loudly from the table behind him and slumped himself down. He knew he had been grouchier than normal lately, something just wasn't right. He felt this restlessness bubble from deep inside of him and it seemed the only way he could keep it at bay was to drink. Even Murdoc had to admit he had been extremely anxious lately, and he knew that the band members could tell.

2D probably got the worst of it, he would find any reason to smack the poor boy until he learned to stay out of his way. Of course, he couldn't do the same thing to Russel, but his verbal threats on the drummer got worse and worse each day. These weren't really unusual actions for the bassist, except for the fact that he didn't enjoy it anymore. He used to tease people, joke around and be able to have a few laughs, even at his own expense. Now he was just angry all the time. He knew people were avoiding him and he knew eventually people would stop talking to him altogether.

Murdoc rested his chin in his hand, leaning glumly over the table and feeling his gold cross clank against it's surface. He wouldn't let himself act this way in front of Noodle. Not her. He made an effort to avoid her at any cost. After all that she had been through, the last thing she needed was to be dealing with an angry, old prick. But he knew that it wasn't the only reason he had been avoiding the teenager lately. Something had happened in Hades, something that had changed the way Murdoc had felt towards the guitarist. And even though Noodle would not have remembered what happened, what they saw, it was ingrained in his mind.

Noodle peered out at him from the other room. They were both completely silent as she watched his every moment. Why did he look so...sad? _Sad? Murdoc does not get sad. Maybe he is just hung-over..._ But the more she studied his actions, the more she realized he did look upset. She felt her chest sink a bit, she did not want to see any of her friends feeling sad.

The Satanist felt the anger boil up inside him again, but this time it was accompanied by an immense heat throughout his body that he had never felt before. He lifted his head up slowly, suddenly feeling so weak. He tried to stand, but felt himself become weighed down around his neck. _Wot the 'ell....feels like 'm bein' choked!_ he thought frantically in his mind. He grapsed at his neck and tried to clear his throat but nothing seemed to help.

All of a sudden, Murdoc's eyes popped open in shock. He looked around the room and then down at his chest. Ever so slightly, he reached down and touched the inverted cross that hung around his neck for so many years. He pulled the shiny symbol close to his face and examined it carefully, turning it about on all sides while doing so. Then, without any warning, he ripped the cross off his neck and slammed it down so hard on the table it sounded like a gun shot.

Noodle gasped as she tried to stop herself from screaming at the sudden actions. She finally stood up off the chair and took a few steps towards the kitchen. Something felt very strange, why was Murdoc acting so different? The last time she had been around him he had been so different, hopeful almost, and even caring. Now, the girl almost felt scared to have him see her, but it was too late. She watched intently as Murdoc slowly turned to face the Jap, his black hair covering his eyes. He looked angry at first but his expression softened slowly as he studied the girl.

"M-Murdoc-san? " was all the girl could muster.

Nobody spoke. The silence was so thick she could swear it was suffocating her. The dark bassist still had his eyes glued to her, not taking her out of his sight for even a second. It seemed almost like he was hypnotized and couldn't break free. His face held no sign of emotion, just eyes. Eyes staring at her from under his black fringe, casting a dark shadow across his brow and making the light dance off his brown eyes. Noodle felt herself shrink almost instantly, feeling increasingly uncomfortable with the situation.

And then without warning, the dark man shook his head and quickly turned around and stomped out of the kitchen. She could hear the loud clunk of his boots echo as he made he hasty exit down the hallway. Finally, she allowed herself to take a breath after what had felt like an eternity. _What was THAT about?_

Ever so slowly, she approached the kitchen table where the object of her interest laid. The dim light overhead glimmered briefly on the old, tarnished cross. Noodle stood in awe looking down upon it, finding it hard to actually look away. Never, in the seven years that she had been around Murdoc, had she EVER seen him take off that inverted cross from around his neck, much less with so much anger. She knew something was not right, but she hadn't the slightest clue what was going on. All she could do was inch closer to the table, almost feeling drawn to the symbolic piece that laid in front of her. She watched herself extend her arm robotically, slender fingers opening up towards it and reaching down. Her hand was so close to it she could swear she felt an energy emitting from the necklace. When she finally clutched it in her hand, she felt a wild surge of heat and excitement rush through her. The forbidden object that had never been left out of the sight of it's owner, the symbol that displayed so much power and confidence in one, now seemed to have transferred over to her.

Noodle smiled wickedly. Her face felt hot and her hand trembled as she intertwined the chain throughout her tiny fingers. It felt so...._good._

She grew a bit more brave as she played with the necklace carelessly. Tossing it back and forth from one hand to the other, never taking her eyes off it. Again, she moved robotically, like her limbs had a mind of their own, as she watched her arms hold the cross higher. It was now dangling over her head, the inverted cross waving slightly in front of her face. She closed her eyes tight and smiled even wider as she felt it lower over her head and rest upon her neck.

****

Murdoc slouched over a half-empty bottle of whiskey in his Winnebago. All he could care to do lately was drink, smoke and slap around 2D. Restlessly, he laid back on the bed while a cigarette hung loosely from his lips, the ashes landing on his already filthy shirt.

All of a sudden, he could hear faint foot-steps in the car park. He thought at first they might have been Stu's, but they sounded a bit too light...and quick. _Meh_, he shrugged to himself and downed the rest of the whiskey in one swig, letting out a loud belch once he had finished. But the footsteps continued, now sounding a bit clearer and closer. Reluctantly, he hoisted himself off the bed and took a few steps towards the door to see who was wandering around outside. Once he finally reached the entrance to the Winnebago, he quickly whipped the door open. Just about to tell whoever was out there to get lost (he assumed it was another pesky demon), he was caught off-guard by a familiar face that sent him staggering back a step or two.

"Hello."

It was Noodle. The young teen greeted him at the doorway with a toothy grin and arms neatly folded behind her back mischievously.

"Uh...hi?" he finally replied after a few seconds of looking at the girl oddly.

"Are you going to let me in, or should I stand out here like a moron for a few more minutes?" she smirked.

Murdoc blinked and then gave his head a shake. He stepped aside and held the door open with his leg as the young girl waltzed in past him. She plunked herself down on one of his old chairs and looked around the room. Then, she picked up a magazine off the floor and began to flip through it, all the while Murdoc watched her in confusion.

"Urr..Welcome back...make yerself at 'ome.." he muttered as he butted his fag out.

"Mmm." she nodded. After a few moments of browsing through the various pages of the magazine, she threw it over her shoulder and leaned forward, starring at Murdoc who was still standing near the entrance of his bedroom. "So!" she exclaimed suddenly, "what should we talk about?"

The bassist was still giving her a hard stare, trying to figure out exactly what the girl was doing here and why she was acting so strange. He assumed she was wondering about his outburst in the kitchen earlier today, but she normally wouldn't pay much mind to him or care if he was upset.

Noodle looked up at him and waited for a response. Seeing that he was not going to say anything, she decided to start the conversation herself. "Your a hard person to find these days. Always holed up in this.." she paused as she looked around, " ...trailer thing."

Murdoc looked around the room, then back at the teen. He slowly opened his mouth as though he was about to speak, but then promptly closed it again and the girl continued. "Well, since you're obviously feeling a bit shy, I might as well get right into this. You mind telling me exactly _why _ you've been avoiding me for the past month now?"

The Satanist looked speechless for the first time in his life. Was this even the same girl? And it wasn't even what she was saying that was the most confusing, it was her _voice._ No longer did she have that cute, Japanese accent and slight studder from learning English as a second language. No, now she spoke confidently, with perfect pronunciation and no sign of an accent.

Something was up.

He walked around the room in front of her, like he was circling his prey. His eyes moved up from her toes and back up to her face as he looked her up and down. "Yew, uh...feeln' awright, gurlie?" he asked slowly as he circled back around and stood in front of her again.

"Peachy."

Murdoc arched an eyebrow. "Jus' checkn'."

"So, are you gonna answer my question?" she looked back up at him with that half-smile again. It was almost like she was expecting to hear something she already knew and was just waiting for him to say it. The bassist looked down at her awkwardly as she gave him a hard stare. There was something different about her eyes.

Or one eye, at least.

Murdoc stopped dead in his tracks. Immediately, he bent down in front of her and placed his hand firmly under her chin to lift her face up. She resisted, shaking her head from side to side as she muttered "What are you doing?"

"Sit still!" he snapped as he grabbed the girl by her shoulder with his free arm. She glared at him angrily with his large hand wrapped under her face. He stared back at her just as hard, looking deep into her eyes. Then, his expression changed from anger to concern. He let his arms go limp by his side while still kneeling in front of her, so they were now face level with each other. _One eye....a different color... _

He felt sick. The only way that would ever happen is...

"Noodle.....did yew..." he tried to speak, but was promptly interrupted.

"Did I...did I...Did I what? I think I should be the one asking the questions, _Mister_ Niccals." she hissed at him. Murdoc looked taken back for a second, but then quickly regained his composure. She sat up straighter now, seeming almost annoyed with his lack of co-operation. "Like, the first question I asked...that you never answered."

Murdoc took his gaze away from the girl and looked down at the ground, his dark hair once again covering his eyes. He took a long pause and then quietly replied, "It's...complicated. Wot do yew care, anyway?"

"Well, if I didn't _care_ then I wouldn't have _asked_." she quickly shot back, her voice filled with frustration. This was not the normal happy-go-lucky teenager he knew. "Anyway...next question..." she was now standing, looking down at Murdoc who still kneeled on the ground across from her. Then, to Murdoc's surprise, the girl undid the first button of her blouse slowly, smirking at the bassist as he rose to his feet.

Then the second button.

Then the third.

"Noodle...wot are-" Just as Murdoc was about to ask her, something caught his eye.

He felt like he had just gotten the wind knocked out of him. Even though he had already known why she was acting strange, he couldn't make himself believe what was happening. Until he saw it.

There, tucked under her shirt, Noodle flashed him the gold, inverted cross she was now wearing around her neck.

"...is your neck feeling a bit bare?" she finally finished.

--------

A/N: Okay, please let me know if there's any parts of this chapter that do NOT make sense or don't fit with the story line. I haven't worked on this for a while now and I get a bit spacey sometimes. Other than that....err...enjoy!


	4. Chapter 4

**_Disclaimer: Wowwy, 2 chapters back-to-back. Y'all are lucky_.**

---

Murdoc scowled at the girl and then took another step closer to her. He was considerably taller than her, and was trying to use the height to his advantage in an attempt to intimidate the guitarist. "Listen, if you think I won't reach down there and get it, you are _sadly_ mis-"

"Oh, you don't scare me." Noodle cut him off as she pushed by him to exit the bedroom. "And actually, I don't think you would _reach down there and get it._" she replied curtly as she mimicked his voice and scrunched her face into a mock frown. He turned to follow her, and then roughly spun her around by her shoulders so she was facing him.

"Listen ta me, yew don't understand this. Jus' leave it alone."

"And what if I don't want to? I want to know why you've been making it a point to avoid being in the same room as me. I think I deserve to know after everything that happened." her face softened as her gaze moved upwards to meet his. For a moment, it looked as though she was about to cry. " I think something happened down there in Hell. And you're not telling me everything." Murdoc said nothing, and looked away from her and back at the ground once again. She frowned.

Suddenly, the young Jap broke free from his grip and stormed out of the Winnebago, into the car park. "And until you decide to tell me everything, you're not gonna be getting _this_ back!" she yelled to him as she held up the cross over her shoulder. Murdoc was left standing in the doorway of the mobile home yet again, watching the small figure walk away.

*********************

Noodle marched angrily through the corridors of Kong studios. The black, empty hallways would normally have kept her very aware of her surroundings, especially at night with the countless zombies wandering the property. But tonight was different, she was so distracted with all the new feelings and strange energy coursing through her body, she hardly noticed anything around her. Until she ran straight into 2D.

"Ugh! Oh surry, Noods. Didn't see yah there. S'dark in 'ere, eh?" the singer regained himself after being knocked back a couple of steps.

Noodle straightened herself up and shook her hair out of her eyes. She caught herself cringing with every word that came out of the man's mouth, almost as if his voice seemed to irritate her.

"-Listen, I'm not feelin' the greatest right now." The young girl cut him off and tried to push past him.

"Oh, wull...are yah sick or sumfink?"

Noodle cringed again. Suddenly that cockney accent just seemed to cut right through her.

"No, I'm not sick. I'm just tired. I'm going to bed." she lied.

But as she tried to leave again, the singer grabbed her arm and tried to take a look at her face. She kept her head down and turned her face away from him. He was really starting to get on her nerves now, why couldn't he just leave her alone?

"'Ey, maybe you should go to tha doctors. Yew ain't lookin' so good. An' wot's wrong with yo' eye?" Stu tried to lean in closer and study her face, not even realizing she was scowling at him all the while.

"Look, I'm fine. Will you just get OUT of my way!" the guitarist finally snapped and shoved him aside. 2D watched her storm away down the hall with his mouth hanging open in shock.

"Erm...mus be tha' time of tha month or sumfin..." he mumbled to himself.

Once Noodle entered her room, she found that she was not able to calm down from her angry state. She felt like a little girl again, everyone telling her what to do and not giving her all the information she needed to know. The frustration inside her was rising and she angrily ripped all the covers of her bed. She threw her pillows across the room and knocked everything off the top of her dresser. The girl took a few deep breaths to try and calm herself down as she looked around the room. It almost felt like she couldn't get enough air, her chest was so tight it was like somebody was sitting on top of her.

She burst out of her room and ran quickly towards the lift, not really sure of where to go. Still trying desperately to get enough oxygen in her lungs, she leaned up against the wall as she waited for the elevator to reach her floor. Suddenly, her vision went blurry and she felt very weak, she looked up from the ground as she heard the familiar "It's there" from the lift. Noodle tried to make her eyes focus as she took a few shaky steps forward.

Then she collapsed.

***

The room was spinning. This was bad. Noodle felt like she might going to throw up as she quickly sat up from the bed and held her head in pain.

"I told yah ta leave this alone."she heard a gruff voice from behind her. "But noooo, yew jus' wouldn't listen."

Noodle looked up to see a blurred version of Murdoc standing over her. Where was she? She opened her eyes to take in her surroundings and was surprised to find herself back in the bassist's Winnebago.

"M-Murdoc...why am I-"

"Don't talk. Jus' listen." The Satanist seemed angry as he took a few steps closer to her. He held a cigarette loosely in his right hand and took a long drag before throwing it in the ash tray in front of him. The girl coughed lightly as the smoke billowed in front of her face.

Noodle slumped down a bit and silently looked up to meet his gaze. She didn't feel angry anymore, though the sick feeling seemed to be getting worse.

"I found yah in the lift, passed out cold. Yew looked like shit." Murdoc continued as he sat himself down in the old chair across from the bed. "I knew it was gonna happen. Tha's why I brought yah back 'ere."

She nodded slowly.

"I wanted tah tell yah...I jus'..." he paused, having a hard time finishing the sentence. "...yew were right."

Noodle looked at him oddly. Right about what? None of this was making any sense to her, but she felt too horrible to care. She just let him keep talking.

"I...have some thing I needa tell yah. About....what happened. In Hell." his voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

There was a long silence that seemed to drag on for an eternity. Noodle had never felt more tense in her life as she sat across from him. He was staring at her, not taking his eyes away. She had never seen him act this way before today.

"Yew gotta understand, Noodle. Yew had been down there for a year an' a half. Nobody had any hope left for yah." He paused again and his voice cracked. She could tell it was hard for him to talk about. "But then I found yew...after lookn' for so long." He stopped again and then leaned forward. To Noodle's surprise, he reached across to her and grabbed her hand, giving it a hard squeeze. "....Noodle..."

She looked up at him with tears in his eyes.

"Yew were... dead."

Noodle felt a tear roll down her cheek. She didn't remember anything from the ordeal and suddenly the weight of the situation seemed too much for her.

"I couldn't handle it, I needed to get you back somehow. It was only because I had experience there before that we were able to escape." He choked again. Noodle felt more tears roll down her face. Seeing Murdoc in so much pain right now, he could barely speak...it was so hard for her to see. He was supposed to be the brazen rock star who could handle anything, the strong one, the rock.

"I...everyone needed to have yah back. An' I sure as Hell wasn't gonna leave yah down there ta rot. So I..." Murdoc stood up suddenly, and fumbled to get another cigarette from the pack in his back pocket. Noodle edged closer to him so she could see him better. She was hanging on to his every word, her chest felt tight and the hair on the back of her neck stood on end.

"I had to make a deal..." he finally finished.

Noodle felt her stomach drop. "A...deal?" she could barely speak.

"I had already sold my soul to the devil. Yew knew that. There was nothing I had to offer that Satan didn't already own." he lit the smoke and took a look drag. Murdoc starred at the ground, no longer able to face the girl.

"So...what happened?" she finally felt brave enough to ask even though she was afraid of the answer.

Murdoc looked at her from under his dark hair. He opened his mouth and let out a long stream of smoke from his lungs.

"I sold 'em your soul."

Noodle blinked. The words he had just said didn't even seem to register in her mind.

"My...my..." was all she could keep repeating over and over again, she was not able to finish the sentence.

"Murdoc...what have you done..." she clasped her chest tightly, feeling for a moment like she was going to pass out again. Murdoc watched her, just waiting for her to yell or scream or hit him...or do anything. He expected her to be beyond furious, but the way she was acting now seemed more like depressed. He hung his head down.

"'M surry, luv. I didn't know 'ow else to get yew back. It was selfish and horrible I know. If yah hate me forever I'll understand." Murdoc stood up to leave the room, but to his surprise, he felt her small hand grab his arm and pull him back down.

She clenched her teeth and gripped his arm tightly, "You....you are one of the worst people I have ever met. You have no compassion for anyone else and only ever think about sex, drugs and liquor." she snapped at him. Murdoc flinched like someone has just burnt him with fire. Noodle looked him dead in the eye as she continued, "But... you risked your life to save me. You brought me back...to my home. I know you do care about me, and you saved my life the only way you knew how."

She was angry, confused and still having an extremely hard time taking in everything that had happened to her and processing the information she had just received. But, part of her was grateful, and happy to know that Murdoc did care for her. She couldn't ignore his intentions.

Murdoc let a small smile play on his mouth. "Of course I care about yah, luv. I always have." He squeezed her hand again, she felt cold. His expression changed again to one of concern as he watched her. She seemed grateful, but sad. Confused and angry at the same time, she was so close but so far away and distant.

He needed to continue, she had to know the whole truth. "Luv, listen to meh, Noods. This is really important. Because of what I did...it completely changes everything for you. And me."

Noodle expression went blank as she continued listening.

"You see, the devil already had my wretched, old soul. But you...your soul is different. The whole reason yew ended up down there was because they sensed your good, pure spirit. And to them, it's the most desirable thing they could ever get their hands on."

The teen nodded again, suddenly getting that sick feeling back in her stomach. She wasn't sure how much more of this she could handle. But Murdoc kept going.

"..So, I had to make a deal with Satan 'imself. I offered him your soul so that you could come back upstairs with me. But what he didn't realize is that I been around tha block a few times, being the fantastic Satanist that I am. I had already negotiated my contract with 'im, an' got a pretty good deal." He paused to look at the girl, making sure she wouldn't faint again.

"What does all of this mean, Murdoc!"

"I'm gettn' there, jus' be patient, girly. The point is, your contract with Satan states your soul goes tah 'im when you reach 75 years-old or die...whicheva' comes first." He stopped as he heard the girl start to whimper and cry. "Noodle, please luv, lemme explain. You have to trust that I know best for yah." Noodle nodded slowly and wiped the tears from her cheeks. The bassist squeezed her shoulder and continued.

"Anyway, that's a pretty basic deal down there. But, what he didn't realize is there's a loop-hole." Noodle perked her head up when she heard this part.

"A loop-hole? How?" she sniffed.

Murdoc turned to look at her, a very odd expression on his face. She cocked her head to the side, confused as she listened to him go on.

"Well, tha's where I come in..." He started. Slowly, he backed away from the girl a bit and sat up straight. Murdoc cleared his throat uncomfortably as he tried to keep going with the story. "Yew see, Noodle-girl..." he paused again, rubbed the back of his neck and then continued, "There's a certain...clause in _my_ contract with the Devil."

"...What _kind_ of clause?" the girl asked cautiously.

"Uhhh...wull...I can't recall exactly how it goes, haven't flipped through it in a while.." he started. But seeing Noodle's frown, he cleared his throat and tried again. "Apparently, though, if I were to find a girl..." he stopped and looked at Noodle. She blushed.

"Well...more specifically...a virgin." Murdoc coughed.

Noodle felt her whole body blush.

"Woah...Stop. Right. There." the teen interrupted. "Are you going to tell me you need to sacrifice a virgin to your insane Devil-Gods or something? Cause if that's the case, I don't think I wanna hear anymore. Also...how would YOU know if I was a virgin?"

Murdoc rolled his eyes. "Okay, first of all, I'm not gonna sacrifice you to any gods. That's just cliché. And secondly, I've lived with you for a good seven years now. I'm sure I would have heard about it at some point if you had been 'deflowered'." Murdoc bent two fingers on each hand to form air-quotes. "Not to mention, Russell would have had some teenage guy's head on 'is mantel." he chuckled as he took another drag from the cigarette.

Noodle cleared her throat once he had finished, and there was a long, awkward silence between the two. "Well...fine." she finally spoke, "What do you need with me, then?"

"Well...I'm sure yew can guess..." Murdoc shifted uncomfortably in his chair and looked at the ground. Noodle looked at him oddly. He sighed, "A'wright, well, if I were to...have a pure, virgin..and say we were to be..urm.._wot's that word_...intimate..."

Noodle's jaw hit the floor.

"Wait a minute...THAT'S your loop-hole?!" Noodle exclaimed as she jumped off the bed. Murdoc cringed and stood up as well.

"Now, I know wot you're thinkn', but it's not like that..." he tried to explain, but was cut off by Noodle.

"Oh, really? Well please, enlighten me. Because it _seems_ like you sold my soul to the DEVIL, but now you're telling me it'll be okay if we do the horizontal-tango?!"

Murdoc smacked his hand into his forehead. This was not how he imagined the conversation going. "It wosn't wot I had intended, I didn't really have time to think the situation through. It happened so quick, yew were _dead_ and I had no other option." He turned away from the girl and leaned on his nearby dresser.

Noodle watched him suspiciously.

He took a deep breath. "Please, luv. This wasn't how I wanted to tell yew. The situation is jus'...fucked up, I know." He turned around to face her again. "That's why I been avoidin' yah, I felt guilty and I wosn't sure wot was gonna happen. I been sittn' here every day since, jus' tryn' to think of sum other way to save yo' soul."

Noodle felt a pinch of guilt in the pit of her stomach. She had no idea of everything that had been going on with the bassist. Now that he had explained it all, she could almost understand why he wouldn't be able to face her. Gently, she placed her hand on his broad shoulder. "Okay, Murdoc. I trust you. Together we can find a way to figure this out, okay?"

"Well, that's wot I been tryn' to do. But...I didn't anticipate wot happened today..."

"What? What happened?"

"...You...wearin' that damned cross..." he muttered. Murdoc ran his hand through his hair and turned to face her again. "S'got a hold on yah now, Noodle."

"_What_ has a hold of me? What do you mean!" she exclaimed, almost fearfully now.

"I mean it's already started!" Murdoc exclaimed loudly as he spun around to face her. Then, he pinched the sides of his forehead to calm himself down. He sighed deeply as he sat down next to her on the bed.

"Look...I'll come clean wif yah, luv. 'Is has been goin' on fo' a while now, but I noticed it more ever since we escaped from the Hell-Hole...I couldn't stop thinkn' about yew, Noodle. At first, I didn't fink nuthin' of it, jus' kept brushin' it off as sumthn' else. Then...I realized it was more than that..."

Noodle looked up at the Satanist, tears in her eyes.

"It's stupid, I know. It didn't make no sense to me either. But I just couldn't get yah outta my mind. And that's the other reason I wos avoiding yew...I knew I was startn' to..." he trailed off again as he looked deep into her now mis-matched eyes.

"...have feelings for you. More than just a band-mate, more than jus carin' about yo' well-bein'." Murdoc finally finished and looked at the ground. Noodle studied his expression, and for the first time since she had ever known Murdoc, she saw him blush. "And I couldn't deal with it, I wos bein' a coward, I know. But I just couldn't handle the way I was feelin' and all the thoughts runnin' through my brain. I tried drinkin'em away, tried to jus stay away from you. But it was like...I had no control over it."

Murdoc reached his hand under his shirt and pulled out the inverted cross that was back in it's rightful spot around his neck. "Why do yew think I always wear this, Noods? It ain't no fashion statement." He fingered the cross for a moment and then tucked it back under his shirt. "It's part of who I _am_, wot I believe in. No matter how much I try to ignore it."

Noodle found his hand on her knee and squeezed it tightly. "I know that...now. It has a power. I felt it as soon as I put it on."

"Yeah.." Murdoc replied sadly. "And the power is more than you'll evah know. Whenever I wos around you, that thing would heat up so much it was like wearin' a hot coal around my neck. An' that night yew spent in my bed...it wos jus' crazy."

Noodle, oddly enough, found herself blushing. She considered that a compliment coming from Murdoc.

"Anyway.." Murdoc continued, "when I wos in the kitchen today, I didn't realize yew were there. It was the first time I been around yah in about a month, so of course this thing went berserk." he motioned to the cross around his neck. "It was so intense, that's why I hadda take it off..."

The guitarist nodded, it was all finally starting to make sense now. "So...what did it mean when I...wore the cross?"

"It means...you're the only one, now. You're marked."

"Marked?"

"Yeah, like I said. I hadn't anticipated it happenin'. But now it's done an' there's nothin' either one of us can do about it." he replied gravely. "That power you felt...it was me, Noodle. It makes yah connect with me in a way...yew jus' wouldn't even begin to understand."

Noodle looked down sadly at her feet swinging at the edge of his bed, "So...what you're saying is...there's no other option, now?"

Murdoc shook his head. "Not unless yew wanna spend eternity with Beelzebub. And as for me...well, let's just say I might be face'n the same fate soon enough."

The girl felt tears fill in her red eyes again as the guilt and fear swelled up inside of her. "Why, Murdoc? What will happen to you?"

"Well, once the 'one' has been marked, it means that's my match, yah know? The other part of the contract. If I'm not with my match.." he looked over at Noodle "..yew..." and then hung his head as he continued, "...then as soon as this body goes..."

"...You go with it." Noodle finished sadly.

"Yew got it, kid. No more new bodies for Mudsy." Murdoc sighed.

Suddenly, he felt Noodle's arms wrap around his shoulders tightly as she let lose a whole new stream of tears. "Shhh, darlin'. It's okay. We'll be a'wright." He held her shaking body close to his.

"No Murdoc. It's my fault. I realize now...if I had just listened to you before and not have tried to force you to explain it to me..." Noodle sputtered into his shirt between sobs.

"No, luv. It's my doin'. You had no idea of wot was goin' on. I should have told you about this as soon as we got back..." He squeezed her shoulders tightly.

The two of them stayed that way for a while, comforting each other in silence for about an hour or so, until they both grew weary and fell asleep on Murdoc's bed. They slept together that night, wrapped up in each others arms and holding one another close. For those few hours of sleep, they were at peace and able to rest without worrying about their fate.

----

_A/N: Again, there's a lot more going on than in the first couple chapters. I am really trying hard to finish this story in a timely fashion because the idea is in my head and I'm afraid it's gonna fly outta there or get all jumbled. Please lemme know if it doesn't make sense or if there's any glaring mistakes.  
_


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Do not own the Gorillaz. But, you guys already knew that by now. **

"Mmmm...Murdoc? Did we fall asleep?" Noodle asked wearily as she rubbed her eyes.

"Hmmmm...yeah, looks like it, luv." he stretched out while raising his arms above his head. "You're probably wantn' to...get outta here..." He looked away from the girl as he lifted himself up off the bed.

"I guess I should be going, yes. I mean...I do have a lot to think about..." Noodle replied.

" ...Wot...do yew mean? The bassist turned around to face her.

"Well, everything we talked about last night. About...us..." She reached her hand up to hold his, but he pulled away.

"Noodle..." he had a sad look on his face again, "look, yew don't have to worry about this, I'm sure I can figure sumthn' out. Besides, I didn't tell yah about this so that yew would feel guilty and do something you don't really want..." Murdoc sighed and sat down beside her. "...this is not somethin' yew need to think about."

"Murdoc, I think we know each other pretty well by now. I know what your intentions are, you made it perfectly clear just how much you really do care about me." Noodle replied as she moved closer to him. Murdoc attempted to hide his red face by turning away and coughing loudly. "And I know it's not something I'm being forced into, either. The truth is..." Noodle placed her hand softly under his chin and lifted his head so he would face her. "I have been thinking about you a lot... since we escaped. Well, even before that..."

Murdoc felt his heart beat louder in his chest. "C'mon luv..."

"No, it's true, Murdoc...I can't explain it, but I know it wasn't just because you saved me." Finally, he held her hand in his as she continued. "These feelings you're having..I'm having them too. Maybe they had always been there. Just...the situation brought us closer together than we ever were before. The feelings were forced to the surface...for both of us." her bright green eyes met his brown ones and they stared at each other for what seemed like eternity. How could this be? How could she be having the same feelings as him, and how long has it really been going on for?

Murdoc didn't know what to say. He honestly had no idea the girl had felt this way about him, and for a moment it almost made him forget about their dire situation. It felt so good for that moment... however, the Satanist knew better. He couldn't let himself be convinced that easily. After all, the girl was still so young. What if she was just trying to spare his feelings? How could he be sure she even felt the same...

He swallowed the lump in his throat. .._but what if she does..._

"But, like I said, I still need....time." she finished, bringing the bassist back down to Earth.

"I know luv, it's a lot to take in. I want yew to understand... whatever decision yew make, that's wot we'll do." Murdoc patted the girl on the shoulder, a bitter-sweet feeling swept up inside of him. He sighed to himself because knew he would have to be patient. This was a very delicate, very unique situation. But deep down, he couldn't help but wonder if he had the ability....or the will power...to handle it correctly.

*****

Over the next few weeks, Murdoc and Noodle would have secret meetings once everyone else had fallen asleep or left the building. They had decided it was best to keep it between themselves and not include any of the other band members in the peculiar predicament. During the day, each would do their own research about the Satanist religion, Demonology, or any other information they could find. And then at night, they would rendezvous and go over their findings together.

But even after all that time and the pages and pages of research, it seemed as though they had no way out of their situation. After the fourth week of searching and coming out empty-handed, they both felt exhausted and disappointed.

"I had no idea there was so much to this whole...religion." Noodle exhaled sadly.

"Yah, I wos try'n to tell yah before. It's all quite intense for someone who doesn't know their way around it." Murdoc replied as he cracked his knuckles. Then, to Noodle's surprise, he pulled her closer to him in a gentle hug. "Look, I'm real sorry for gettin' yah involved in this, hun."

"There is no need to apologize, M-Murdoc-san. You did what you thought was best... and it saved my life." She stammered a bit as she looked up at him, then hesitantly leaned up against his chest.

"Yeah, but at wot cost? Who am I to decide your fate, it wos wrong and selfish...and a horrible thing to do." Murdoc's harsh words made Noodle frown. She wrapped both her thin arms around his mid-section and pulled him in close. As odd as it was seeing the Satanist being so hard on himself, she had to admit it was nice to finally hear him being responsible too. The girl closed her eyes and let herself go in the embrace, taking that chance to collect her thoughts and breathe in his (for once) refreshing aroma.

She didn't know what to say to comfort him, maybe she didn't need to say anything at that moment. All she could think about was how close they had grown in the past few months. She had seen Murdoc in a completely different light and, whether he wanted to admit it or not, he had changed. It was almost as if it were happening right under her nose this whole time...but she had to admit, she was really starting to like it. It seemed even the little details she hadn't noticed before were starting to become glaringly obvious. For starters, his hygiene was much better. The green, sharpened fangs he used to call teeth looked white and clean, almost presentable now. Hair was no longer jutting out in every direction (but still maintained a cute, shaggy look). Even his body was in better physical shape, which she confirmed by secretly squeezing his muscular arm that was wrapped around her. All of this was complimented with a fresh new attire of clothing which somehow gave the bassist a clean cut/bad-boy quality at the same time.

Not to mention his personality. God...she had no idea he was actually so strong and protective, or even thought about her feelings. He was gruff and rough like the old Murdoc she knew for so many years, and still kept his clever, witty sense of humor. But seeing him act this way, the way he cared so much about her and wasn't afraid to show it...it made her heart leap into her chest.

_What are you doing to me, Murdoc-san..._she sighed hopelessly to herself.

"Wot wos tha', hon?" his gruff voice broke her out of the trance and she looked up at him.

"Sorry, I didn't say anything." she felt her face go hot. "Anyway Murdoc-sama, you should not beat yourself up so. We will figure everything out." Noodle leaned into his chest again, wanting to be as close to him as possible. But as she closed her eyes, her chest went tight and she realized she felt...afraid. Afraid of what was happening between them.

_All this time, trying to find other options, trying to think of another way...what if the only option left IS the right way..._

Ever so slowly, she shifted her weight and leaned in closer to his torso, her arm moving slightly upwards over his thigh. Noodle grinned to herself, she wasn't sure what she was doing or why she was doing it, but she liked feeling the bassist react under her touch. His body would go tense when she moved her hand over his thigh with barely a soft touch. She could feel his arm wrap just a bit tighter around her, moving down more towards her waist. It sent shivers down her spine. Noodle leaned up into his chest, letting her neck lean back so her head fit perfectly rested on his shoulder. She didn't realize it, but she was also giving him a perfect shot of her newly formed cleavage. His heart beat louder in his chest as he couldn't help but tilt his head to the side to catch a glimpse down at her figure.

_No, bad Murdoc...this is bad...but still, quite nice...NO! Stop it! _He screamed in his thoughts, yet he couldn't seem to pry his eyes away. All those nights he spent thinking about her, watching her from a far, wishing he could be this close to her. Now she was laying in his arms and he was staring down her top? _Real suave, dumb-ass..._

The tension was becoming almost too much for both of them. Noodle could feel her whole body tingling while she laid up against his strong body. He caught her chest rising and falling faster as her breathing picked up. For an instance their eyes met. She sat up straighter, as did he.

He watched as she leaned into him and felt her arm wrap around his shoulders. It was almost happening in slow-motion, he knew what she was doing but he didn't dare make a move. He tried to lean back but her face inched closer in to his, their lips were oh so close with barley a space between them as each one closed their eyes and braced for impact. Finally, he felt her soft lips collide into his shaking ones as they shared a passionate kiss that only lasted a moment. Noodle pulled away first and caught her breath harshly.

Murdoc's eyes shot open in surprise and he stared straight ahead for a moment. Then slowly turned towards the guitarist again. Noodle looked back up at him in shock with a bright, red blush spread across her face.

Noodle opened her mouth as if to speak, but then quickly closed it and turned away from the bassist.

Murdoc said nothing, he was still staring at her with a surprised expression.

"...I...I'm sorry...It's late. I should probably go." was all the girl could squeak out as she made a mad-dash for the door. Before Murdoc could even say anything, she was already standing up and starting to briskly walk away.

It wasn't until she was in the carpark that she felt his pressence behind her. She hung her head down with a deep blush still high-lighting her cheeks. She could tell he was standing in the doorway, watching her...waiting for her.

But she wouldn't turn back around, it was all too much. Why did she have to go and do something so completely stupid? As if the situation weren't weird enough, now she has to go and make an ass out of herself by _kissing_ him. Noodle mentally berated herself before dodging quickly into the lift and closing her eyes tight until she was sure the door was closed.

"What is _wrong_ with me!" the guitarist breathed to herself as she walked out onto the second floor. Slowly, she paced back to her own room, feeling like crawling under the bed and staying there for a month. Instead, she sat crossed-legged on the floor and took out her over-sized head phones. "Maybe some music will take my mind off this", she muttered.

Meanwhile, back in the car park...

Murdoc was dumbfounded. Had that really happened? Did she really kiss him, or was it just some dream?It forced him to think about their current situation and everything that had been going on recently. It was true, he knew he had strong feelings for her. But as far as he was concerned, Noodle may not even feel close to the same way. He had already decided she was too young to understand what these feelings were, to tell the difference between infatuation and true feelings. And with all the emotions flying around, maybe she was looking for some security. Looking for someone to just...keep her safe and be close to her.

Murdoc frowned as he thought through the situation.

He sat rigidly down on the bed and leaned forward as he reached for yet another cigarette. The past few months had been such an emotional roller-coaster ride. He couldn't even begin to imagine what that had been like for Noodle. And it had all started with him making a horrible decision. Why did he have to her fate into his hands? _She would have been better off if she had never met me..._

Suddenly, he felt a surge of anger pulse through him and he threw the nearby ashtray into the wall. It made a loud crash that even 2D heard from his room. Murdoc paced quickly back-and-forth through the Winnebago. He had to handle this, had to save her...from him. He knew what he had to do...

Without even a second thought, the Satanist began to pull out drawers and dig into them while pulling out various tools. He reached his hand under his shirt and squeezed the inverted cross that laid across his neck.

Murdoc headed out the door of the trailor with an old army bag swung over his shoulder. It was time to pay his old friend Satan a visit.

-------------

A/N: Well, here's the next chapter. Sorry to leave it on a cliff hanger but, hey...that's what I do. Lemme know of any errors, yadda yadda yadda...


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